Objects of His mercy

I am going to confess to you a sin of mine that I have been faced with these past few days...

I covet.

I covet the comfort of the lives of others. Those who have yet to experience great loss or pain. Those who's lives have not been marred with this type of grief. Those who can go through their daily activities without being stopped, dead in their tracks, from the aches of the loss of a child. I covet those who have been able to keep all of their babies. I envy them.

Lord, help me. I do not want this bitterness to grow. God, forgive me. I am not one to question to whom you give and to whom you take away.

I was reading in Romans 9 this morning and came across a phrase that spoke to me, that then sprouted into many more thoughts of God's mercy, and then into thoughts of heaven, and I would like to share them with you today.

I read Romans 9:23;
"What if He did this to make the riches of His glory known to the objects of His mercy,..."

We are the objects of God's mercy.

Later, Paul quotes Hosea;
" I will call her 'my loved one' who is not my loved one"

Again, we are the objects of God's mercy.

Loved, when we do not deserve to be loved.

The created of the creator.

Romans 9:20;
" But who are you, Oh man, to talk back to God? Shall what is formed say to Him who formed it, 'Why did you make me like this?' Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for noble purposes and some for common use?"

I see, and only because God has enabled me to see, that even in losing precious time on earth with my son, God has shown me mercy.

When I see my true place before God, as the created of the creator, I see that God really was good to me in this circumstance. For I did not receive what I truly deserve; death. Ezra is not dead, he has been given more life than ever. The story of this earthly death of my son is not the end. Ezra is not lost forever in the darkness of death, and neither shall I be when my time comes. Because we are the objects of God's mercy, we will be carried tenderly by the angels, from this life to the next.

There is no true death for us who are in Christ Jesus.

There is only life with Christ.

"I tell you the truth, if anyone keeps my word, he will never see death."
John 8:51

My perspective has been shifted from seeing Ezra as merely existing in heaven, to Ezra's life in heaven. I need to give myself the time to imagine what Ezra's life in heaven might be like. I do not claim, ever, to know what heaven will be like, but as long as it does not go against what we know to be true in scripture, I do believe that God gave us our imaginations for a reason. And perhaps he wants us to dream about heaven. Perhaps He is glorified when, in reverence to Him, we imagine the wonders of His glory.

Ezra's life in heaven might look a lot like the life he would have lived here, only one million times better.

He might be up there playing with all the other babies who have recently come to dwell in heaven.

Maybe he is being loved on by my Grandpa and all our other loved ones who are in heaven.

Maybe he is splashing and playing in the streams of living water.

Maybe he is giggling with delight as he watches a lion and a lamb play together.

Maybe he listens, peacefully, to the sounds of the angels singing praise to God.

Maybe precious angels hold Ezra in their arms, as they gather to sing praises to the Lamb.

Maybe Ezra has a little white robe as the angles do.

Maybe his cradle, if a baby would even need one in heaven, is beside the throne of God.

He might be carried by my Grandfather as they follow Jesus around, basking in His light, and watching Him perform His wondrous deeds.

Maybe he is watching, as God commands the snow to fall on earth from the storehouses of snow in heaven.

Maybe Ezra is watching, as God paints rainbows, sunrises, and sunsets in the sky with the stroke of His hand.

Maybe Jesus is holding Ezra just as I would. Snuggled on his chest, kissing the top of his warm little head every once in a while.

Maybe Jesus looks into Ezra's eyes and talks to him lovingly, as I would. Telling Ezra how he is His special treasure and that He will love him forever.

Maybe Jesus tells Ezra about his mommy and daddy, and that we love him so much, and that we can't wait until we get to see him again.

And maybe, the things of heaven are ten thousands times greater than what I can imagine, and I have not even scratched the surface of the wonders to come.

We are the objects of God's mercy, and blessed beyond all reason to even have a reason to be thinking of something as wondrous as heaven. We are humbled as his creation to be with Him forever and ever, Amen!